Monday, October 20, 2008

Alive

Two years ago on this day at this time I was lying in a bed surrounded by lots of people and being pumped full of morphine. Not as awesome as it sounds, since I was broken in nine places and burned in others and completely in shock. Actually, around this exact time of night I think I was getting my face stitched up by a hottie plastic surgeon, so things were getting a little better.

It was only TWO years ago that I got smashed up by two large vehicles, and yet it seems soooo far away that sometimes I almost forget it really happened. Seriously. If it weren't for the scar on my leg that looks like a map of Asia and a part-titanium arm that predicts the weather, I would have to pull out my medical records to prove it. Sometimes I'm just so shocked that I'm still standing. And still jumping, running, eating, dancing, laughing, and brushing my teeth. Holy shit.

I'm still a typical girl in that I rarely look in the mirror and love everything I see; I probably criticize myself far too often. But every now and then I think "whoa, I just walked up all those stairs" and "damn, I just put my hair in a ponytail" and remember when those things seemed impossible. And then I think "thank you, knees, for bending properly" and "thank you, arm, for stretching so high." Thank you knees. Thank you arm. Thank you shoulders and teeth and lungs and fingers. Thank you EMTs and nurses and surgeons and physical therapists and person who donated the B positive blood that got transfused into me (weeeeird). Thank you brain for being functional enough to let me write this.

And - at the risk of getting all motivational-speaker and Chicken-Soup-for-the-Soul on you - I think you should do the same thing. Look in the mirror and say "thank you feet and hands and spine and brains and hips and teeth." For just one second, appreciate how insanely awesome it is that your body works because you never know when it might not for awhile. Or forever.

Now go be alive. Do it.

2 comments:

Robert said...

Being alive is pretty awesome :) You're pretty awesome too. Do you feel just a little bit indestructible? ;) Hope all is well!

RavenMcCoy said...

i do feel indestructible! still not playing in traffic though...